I met Nick in the summer of 2024. It was his second night at the table running the Sunday night trivia game in the wood-paneled party room of Murf’s Pub. Though there were kinks to work out in time, I admired his commitment to keeping the game flowing in a crowd of people who, for the most part, were still strangers to him. Through his questions and banter with us playing the game, I gleaned his sense of humor and flair for the esoteric, both of which I recognized in myself. At the evening’s end, he asked for any willing cohosts for the next week’s game, and I volunteered. Over the proceeding week, I was first touched by two qualities of Nick’s that came to more and more thoroughly define him in the months that I came to know him – His gratitude and his effort.

Every Sunday night spent with Nick was marked with gratitude and accreditation for those whose efforts made those evenings possible. He took time every night to ask for applause for our bartenders and servers, and he always toasted Andy Morton, whose efforts over 20+ years of running Smackdown trivia on Sunday evenings had so enriched the lives of Nick, me, and countless others in Lawrence. He was always effusive with appreciation and praise for his cohosts – Often three to four times per game, sometimes at random (at least in my case, sometimes when I’d make some self-disparaging comment about my math capabilities), he’d ask the players to applaud us for our work in writing questions and keeping score up on the board. He always took the time to recognize the work that others had put in.

One does not always know when the person they recognize is parched for just that; when they’ve burnt themselves out throwing themselves into work, hobbies, and relationships to what feels like no avail. To be so generous in stating one’s gratitude is a genuine virtue, one that I owe to him to embody myself, knowing now that I will never be able to thank him directly for the work he put into trivia each week. 

His work, facilitating a space where players across Lawrence convened each week, was immense. Though, zoomed-out, it may seem like a silly bar game, the Tenkaichi Budoquiz (Full Title – The Tenkaichi Budoquiz, Strongest Under the Heavens BARtial Arts Trivia Tournament) was our weekly ritual, our place to spend time together, to make new friends, and put our minds to the test. By inviting so many cohosts to the front, he encouraged us to be creative, to demonstrate our personalities, and to invite our friends into that space along with us. Those Sunday evenings mattered, and will always matter to me, and I will always admire how he came to the table every Sunday night to have fun with us, regardless of whatever was going on in his life outside of that room. It’s a hobby that takes a lot of time, brain power, and effort, but one that pays dividends to those who come out for it. 

It provided a kind of home base for us: When my cousins, all originally from Lawrence, but now living in far-flung cities like Oakland, Boulder, or Chicago, came back home for Christmas break, they said “We have to make it out for trivia,” and surely enough brought a huge team out, each in matching t-shirts. When my friend Kalen, now out in Buffalo for graduate school, came back to visit over a week in December, she spread the trip out over two Sundays to make it to two trivia games with Nick. Perhaps the greatest praise I can give Nick is to recognize how those conversations reflected those that Mike O’Donnell and I had in my San Diego apartment back in the summer of 2019, pining for evenings of Sunday night Smackdown with Andy back in Lawrence. Through trivia, Nick’s effort, courage, and love helped to make Lawrence into the wonderful place that it is, and his absence will be felt every Sunday night that follows.