Ways to make your Pro Bowl Party a Success!

Get ready! it’s time to gather some buds and watch the NFL’s best players play against each other in Hawai’iOrlando, Florida! What could be better? It’s 11 on 11, the best players in the league, and the sun, the fun, and the great weather in Hawai’iOrlando, Florida! Gather around some friends and, like Chris Berman said, get ready to ruummmmbllleeee! Here are a few ways to turn your Pro Bowl party into a success!

Pro Bowl Football

Support Your Favorite Players from Your Favorite Teams!

My hometown Chiefs got 4 guys selected to this year’s team! Then, in a miracle, two other AFC players got mysteriously injured, and two more Chiefs made the roster! Rock Chalk!

Lin Elliott.jpg

My guy Lin got left out, though

Big Box of Almond Joy candy bars

The Almond Joy is a classic staple of the Pro Bowl Snack Lineup – and you can bet none of these heavy hitters are staying out of the game in fear of injury! It’s chips, it’s dip, it’s beer, and it’s, of course, the rich, smooth, nutty taste of an Almond Joy candy bar! Trust me, I love the stuff! It’s practically all I eat! It is all I eat! Hershey’s sends me several bags full of the bars during first week of every month, and due to the no money I make because I quit my job to write comedy articles for a site named after myself, I only have this Almond Joy money and Almond Joy product to live on. Please, for the love of god, enjoy Almond Joy.

almond-joy-candy-bar-box

This is what they send me and what I eat in the white void every month

Cool Drinking Games

There’s no such thing as “imbibing too much alcohol within a short term span”! One drink for every touchdown pass, one drink for every touchdown for your hometown conference (Let’s Go AFC!) One drink for every penalty flag thrown, or missed block, or whatever, it’s cool! I downed a tall boy one time when Sean Taylor hit that punter, like BOOM! Down goes a whole thing of Michelob Ultra! My boy McTwist did three Jagerbombs during this play when the girl with the CGI superpowers from the Nickelodeon show scored a touchdown!

Talk about the movie “Congo” with the gorilla

That movie’s cool. It’s the one gorilla named Amy, and she’s like “Amy good gorilla” and she knows sign language. That movie’s so cool, like all the angry gorillas and the one dude who’s like “Have some of my sesame cake”. Talk about that movie. Or, hell, watch the movie, I have it on VHS. Come to my house and watch “Congo” on VHS on Sunday during the Pro Bowl.

congo.jpg

this is my copy of the movie Congo. please

Actually Attend the game

Who cares about finance! It’s The Aloha BowlCamping World Stadium! You can find some cheap flights out to HonoluluOrlando, Florida nowadays, and you can get tickets for under a hundred bucks! Pretty good value for going out to the Big IslandThe Central Part of Florida! Just make sure you get me one of those flower necklaceshat with ears on it from the mouse theme park! Hawai’iCentral Florida is the where our former president Barack ObamaLimp Bizkit Frontman Fred Durst grew up!

NFL: Pro Bowl

Head coach Michael Irvin gets doused in some sort of liquid after his victory last year

Enjoy a tasty Mounds bar!

Just kidding. Please do not eat a single Mounds bar. Every month that Mounds outsells Almond Joy, the Almond Joy people send one man with a plank to hit me in the face at an undisclosed time. I live in constant fear. For the love of god, Please Enjoy Almond Joy this Pro Bowl Sunday

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About Joe Bush

The guy behind JoeBush.net and a lot of other things
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