Monday Update: 11/3/14

Posted on November 3, 2014 by Joe Bush

Well if it isn’t another weird week

NBA 2K15 (XBONE): Fourth Appearance, Fourth Straight Appearance

Today’s entry is about Michael Kidd-Gilchrist and how I wish he would shoot more. In MyCareer, I constantly feed him the ball when he’s open, and he constantly feeds it back to me, convinced that he won’t make an open shot. The real MKG isn’t quite like that, and the roster update reflects that. Also, I keep losing games, and I don’t know if it’s really supposed to be that way or if the mode is supposed to have you end out of the playoffs at the end of your rookie season. I know you’re supposed to be a free agent at the end of your rookie season, so I’d imagine there’s a little bit of incentive to go somewhere else built in. Also, I noticed that I got into the starting lineup far faster than I did in 2K14, where I was almost the entire way through the season before my player was starting. It’ll be interesting to see where it all goes.

NCAA Football 2003 (XBOX) : Second Appearance, Second Straight Appearance

Oh my goodness. Had any of my equipment worked like I would’ve liked it to (i.e. my capture card doesn’t emit the grainiest thing possible, my microphone didn’t suddenly develop a weird buzz, my hallway remains free of loud vacuums) this would be the greatest comeback in history. 14-0 with 1 minute and 38 seconds left in the game and I came out on top 17-14 because video games are weird. I missed two field goals before my last three possessions, and I didn’t pay for leaving points out on the field at all. To top all of that off, I made the last field goal. If you look at the 29:30 mark, you’ll see I had a player leave the game with a migraine. Immediately after getting that news, there’s a 71-yard touchdown pass, followed by a successful onside kick (which I believe to be a first for me in NCAA Football 2003). On top of all that? I know next to nothing about the Old Oaken Bucket or the football programs of either Indiana or Purdue. I don’t even understand why they play for a bucket, but that’s because I’m an outsider. This comeback was a weird combination of luck, vacuums, and Indiana.

Goldeneye 007 (N64): First Appearance

Thanks to the work of many dedicated Counter-Strike modders, I know many of Goldeneye’s maps like the back of my hand. However, that doesn’t mean I have as many good memories of Goldeneye as I do Counter-Strike. That’s mainly due to the poor aging that faces many N64 games (or just games of that era, for that matter). There are fewer games that aged well on the N64 than aged poorly off of the top of my head. Just for an experiment, here are all of the games from the N64 that I think aged well off the top of my head:

Wave Race 64, F-Zero GX, Paper Mario, NBA Hangtime, Super Smash Bros., Star Fox 64 (Though not having a save function dates it in a completely different way than these others), Doom 64

Here are a few that immediately come to mind that didn’t age well:

Super Mario 64, Turok, Goldeneye 007, Perfect Dark, Cruis’n USA, Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire, Duke Nukem 64, Mortal Kombat Trilogy, Blast Corps

Those are just a few, and don’t think I’m being scientific here at all, but it’s really surprising what still feels good after 18 years of N64 games, and where the cracks have started to show.

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Dailies for the week of October 27th-31st

Posted on November 3, 2014 by Joe Bush

Anything can happen on halloween.

MONDAY:

My favorite thing about this video is how my skeptical friend has his world shaken up by the abilities of the ants against the praying mantis.

TUESDAY:

The Detlef Schrempf jersey was my greatest investment of all time

WEDNESDAY:

fuck baseball. Also, I know that Ben and Joe were also more broken up about not being able to film after game seven than the Royals’ lost

THURSDAY:

An otherwise riveting episode of Trophy Hunt is ruined by the fact that my microphone (which I’ve used for 3 years now, so I’m not totally surprised) has stopped functioning properly, and someone thought it was good to vacuum. The next few months hopefully will yield me purchasing a better capture card, a microphone that is more portable and works better, and more “real” videos.

FRIDAY:

I don’t want to spoil the video but this is about the biggest thing that has ever happened to me.

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Monday Update: 10/27/14

Posted on October 28, 2014 by Joe Bush

NBA 2K15 (XBONE): Third Appearance, Third Straight Appearance

Well alright I’m bad at this game, also I chose to try MyGM with the Jazz, which is further proof that I’m bad at this game. The actual season starts up within a couple of days, and I haven’t played a pro sports game throughout a season since maybe ESPN NFL 2K5 (Granted, it’s really hard to convince me to spend $60 on a sports game a week after release). This week I think I’m gonna start trying out the MyTeam mode some more, and I’ll update you on that later.

Wolfenstein: The New Order (XBONE): Third Appearance, Last Appearance 7/28/14

Sometimes I forget to play a game for several months, and it’s kind of a shock when I try to get back into them. Wolfenstein was actually the first game that I bought for my XBOX One, and, uh… There’s very little to say about it. The storytelling’s a little clunky (and I must point out that I’m only about an hour and a half into the game), but I’m having fun and I’ll get more into it next week.

NCAA Football 2003 (XBOX): First Appearance

Be on the lookout for a video series starting soon… It’ll be a little out of left field (sports pun)

Go Royals, please god don’t lose tomorrow night, pleeeeaaaaase, and also listen to the new Deerhoof which comes out next week! Have a spooooooooooooooooooky halloween, my friends.

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Dailies for the Week of October 20th-24th

Posted on October 25, 2014 by Joe Bush

This week has been overshadowed by the fact that The Royals are in the World Series?

Monday

This is the first video that I feel I uploaded for the sake of documentation. The world needs to see this, needs to see me, in a state of a second baseball game following a first baseball game, in the second game of which two pitchers pitch shutouts. It’s slightly ridiculous. I give a little bit of critique of MLB 2005 in this video, but it’s probably gonna be Old Sports Game #26 so look out for that. This video features a song that I really enjoy as well.

Tuesday

Speaking of the Royals… (They lost Tuesday night by the way)

Wednesday

I worked at a retail store over the summer. “Seinfelding” is a term that I created after drawing inspiration from a number of teenagers who would come in, look through all of our items, pick the ones that they thought were funny out, and make commentary on them. “Who really needs a pair of Chicago Cubs safety scissors?” they’d say, “Why you got all this Jayhawk shit?” they’d ask.

Also, just by the way, that’s the worst question you can ask in that line of business. “Why do you carry this specific team that I don’t like?” Do you think it’s funny? How funny is it, really? I mean, think about it. Think about it long and hard. Why in the world would I find that funny? “Why do you have all this Heat gear?” Because someone is going to buy it. Your affiliation only matters in retail when there’s a dollar amount attached.

Anyway, Seinfelding is creating a humor routine out of everything. Trying to find humor in a rack of PS2 games, trying to joke about the CD of U2’s greatest hits you have sitting on the counter, it is this tweet. I know people who are like that.

Thursday

People give out free copies of the New Testament every year, I picked one up.

Friday

A fun YouTube quiz

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Monday Update: 10/20/14

Posted on October 21, 2014 by countrichtertoffen

Last week was weird.

NBA 2K15 (XBONE): Second Appearance, Second Straight Appearance

I’m having many of the same problems I had with 2K14 on the 360 back in April, mainly that I’m not good and I can’t make shots and all my passes get intercepted. Also the coach chews me out after every practice as it seems. Even if I think I do well, he’s angry, so clearly I haven’t done well.

The next-gen version of 2K14 was better than the XBOX 360 version, but the cutscenes in the next-gen game were far lacking. The cutscenes this year are quite improved. Your agent has a little more of a personality (granted, “any personality at all” is far more than was in 2K14), and I like how there’s more of an actual story that isn’t “you got drafted now go play basketball.” Also, it fixes the continuity error of throwing an extra pick (actually, an extra two picks counting your rival Jackson Ellis) into the draft yet still, miraculously, my team ended up with the same first round pick that they did in the actual 2014 draft. Having Ernie Johnson and Shaq in the game as analysts was a good idea, even if it’s a formality, because I always skip over pregame stuff like that, and I’m glad they gave Doris Burke a couple extra frames of animation.

I haven’t played much of the MyGM mode, only two games with the Mavs, and let me tell you: Jameer Nelson isn’t gonna be as good this season as I’m making him in the game. That was a surprising pickup this summer, though I like his veteran presence, I would’ve rather seen a little younger player at point, even though I don’t know exactly who that could be (I mean Mario Chalmers was a name that kept coming up and I’d definitely take Jameer over him). Losing Calderon made me sad because he was one of my favorite players, but Jameer’s alright. The defense is a big weakness, so the offense has to be on point and I can’t miss like 6 straight shots like I did with Monta in my last game. At the moment, I predict a spot around 4th or 5th in the Western Conference, possibly a second round appearance, but probably not much more unless they get paired up with OKC in round 2.

Also I replaced someone with the ’96 SuperSonics, so in the future there’s a franchise in the Emerald City like there really should be, even though Detlef Schrempf’s also gonna be a piece of that future. and god bless him. #Detlef2K14

MLB 2005 (PS1): First Appearance

I believe in Video Game Theism. I believe there is a figurative god in video games, and it’s vengeful and doesn’t care at a certain point. I’ve previously stated that there is at least one godless setting in all of gaming, and I believe I have found another. And it’s more of a time-setting. Past about inning 15, especially when both pitchers have thrown almost perfect innings since the middle of the sixth, the work of Abner Doubleday, Babe Ruth, Jackie Robinson, Reggie Jackson, Stan Musial, Barry Bonds, all the way up to Yasiel Puig is all for naught and baseball becomes nihilistic. After a second full game of baseball, there is nothing to see, there is nothing to be excited about, no peanuts, no cracker jacks, no caring about whether or not you ever get back, no caring about “back” at all, no time, no time, no innings, no Mariners, no Royals, no Raul Ibanez, no Rauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul

No Lemonade, No Lemonade, No Lemonade.

No woo.

Others that don’t warrant more than a few seconds of mention:

Five Nights at Freddy’s (PC): First Appearance, probably last appearance: There’s a legitimate fear here, but it’s all based in the jump-scare and I ran out of power, so I knew it was coming, even though I walked all the way across the room and yet, life works in mysterious ways and maybe I’m the best player at this game of all time

I keep just typing the word “Football” (Brain): what the fuck am I doing: Literally every time I have put a line break in this article while I’ve typed it, I’ve written the word “football.” I don’t know why. I can’t even think about football without getting sick after my favorite team’s best linebacker set a season record for tackles in a game and yet they still lost by two touchdowns because Lubbock is a weird place

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Dailies for the week of October 13th-17th

Posted on October 20, 2014 by Joe Bush

I put at least one video up each weekday if I remember to do so. If I deem the video to be a “game related” video, it goes on my main channel and if it’s not really totally “game related” it goes up on the other channel.

MONDAY

This video was meant to go up on last Friday, but the video file had a hard time uploading and processing, so I put it off until the next week. It was meant to be a preview for the American League Championship Series that was happening last week which happened to feature my favorite baseball team. By the time the episode went up, the Royals were up 2-0, so the preview was kind of a moot point. Didn’t matter anyway AM I RIGHT

This was almost the saddest I have ever been at the end of an episode of Sports of the Day. Almost. The idea of this series is that I’m gonna win every rivalry trophy in NCAA Football 2003 for the XBOX.

TUESDAY

This was a happier day

WEDNESDAY

This video made me a little upset because it took forever to upload, and also I had a much better video description when I originally tried to upload it. I like the idea of someone developing bizarre techniques of critiquing food and then someone first encountering those techniques In Medias Res. “Mr.” Cola is a good cola. Also I stole this idea from Ben

THURSDAY

I am not good at 2K15, as it turns out. It’ll probably be a while before I’m good at it.

FRIDAY

RIP to that Mario doll, RIP to those plaid shorts, RIP to my old hard drive, RIP to my old University of Hawaii shirt, and thank goodness it ended up on my Laptop. The shirt said “UH” and we all laughed at it back in eighth grade. I should’ve gone to UH.

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Monday Update: 10/13/14

Posted on October 14, 2014 by Joe Bush

Well it’s one of those weeks where new shit has come out and I’ve only played that new shit for the most part. I have things to say about them.

Super Smash Bros (3DS): Third Appearance, Second Straight Appearance

Alright! I found a main: Dr. Mario. My favorite character in Melee was Mario, my favorite character in Brawl was Luigi, and that’s pretty much exclusively because he used down-special for the hurricane, and that’s my favorite move. Mario’s hurricane was replaced by F.L.U.D.D. in Brawl, which made me really dislike him, which then turned me on to Luigi. Dr. Mario represents what I wanted from Mario all along, which is comfort and the familiarity of 2002. Back then, I was willing to learn a new character, but I didn’t. I was a Mario man since the original. 2008 came around and I became a Luigi man. But now, it’s 2014, and I’m back in business with the Doctor. Back in my comfort zone.

Maybe I’ll play as Shulk, or Little Mac, or whoever else is new, but for the first time that I can remember, something that I liked in a series that I liked was taken out and then put back in. It’s important to me, at the very least.

NBA 2K15 (XBONE): First Appearance

ALRIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN GET READY FOR THE GAME I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR ALL YEAR. MyCareer mode, new version of Craig LeChuck, new team, new story, new agent who I absolutely adore and yes, indeed, yes, a MyTeam mode that I actually understand. Look out for the crazy amount of talking I’m going to do on this game from now until the end of the season.

Who is Craig LeChuck? I don’t know. The general background is this: I needed to create a character for Skate 3 on the XBOX 360. That was the name my brain thought of, probably inspired by Captain LeChuck of “Secret of Monkey Island” fame and Craig of “innocuous enough name” fame. He was originally a tall white guy with medium-length hair and glasses, but has gained more and more skin pigment in every reiteration of the character, and my 2K15 edition of LeChuck appears to be hispanic.

2K14 Craig appears from afar in this video, but I will get images of him in the future

Here’s Craig from early 2011, originally named John Madden but later retconned to be an official Craig LeChuck

Early 2013 Craig appears in this video, and is hit by a car. I began a second file and actually named the character “Craig LeChuck.”

In 2K15, Craig’s about 6’7″, plays Point Guard, and was picked up out of free agency by the Charlotte Bobcats Hornets. On that note, I’m super excited for the team in Charlotte to be named the Hornets again. I’ll update you.

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Monday Update 10/6/14

Posted on October 7, 2014 by Joe Bush

WEBSITE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. WE’RE IN THE 21ST CENTURY LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. THE MONDAY UPDATE IS NOW OFFICIAL. If you’re looking for older updates, they’re still available at the old blog

The Sims (PC): Second Appearance, Last Appearance 9/22/14

Saturday night I was up at camp doin’ stuff with Ben and Joe. That should set the scene for most of this update unless otherwise specified. They asked me to make them a family, so I gave them (the RTM family, as they came to be known) an empty $3,000 lot with a $20,000 budget, leaving $17,000 free for building the perfect house.

10 minutes later, they were out of money, having a two-story, two-room house with an outhouse, two beds, an easel, a refridgerator, and a stove. They did not have a shower, or a computer, or any chairs. They did have a $6,000 mechanical bull right in the middle of the living room, however. This bull became the Berlin Wall of this particular game of Sims. “We need to shower” said the Sims. “We want another mechanical bull” said both Ben and Joe. “You really need to come into work with your comfort and hygiene ratings not at an absolute low” said Sim-Joe’s boss. “We want another mechanical bull” said both Ben and Joe.

However, they ran out of money and we ran out of attention span before we could purchase the second mechanical bull. That wasn’t before we sold off the inessential floorboards of the top floor, the stove, the microwave, the carpet, and the wallpaper on both the inside and outside of the house.

RollerCoaster Tycoon (PC): Fourth Appearance, Last Appearance 9/15/14

I’m actually trying to beat it all this time. I’m going to earn the right to play the expansion pack. Has anyone actually ever made it to the last scenario of the original game? I can’t imagine anyone having that great of an attention span. I hope I do. Maybe this would be a good game to do some sort of a video about.

Thank you for reading that weird stream of consciousness. There is little to say.

Super Smash Bros (3DS): ~Second Appearance, Last Appearance 9/15/14

This was the first game I ever waited in line for at a GameStop at midnight, and it was actually a pretty good experience. Likewise, after actually playing it, I had a pretty good experience. A game like Smash Bros. is hard to qualify the week after release because I haven’t had the chance to play it with friends for more than a few hours. I like Luigi a lot, Dr. Mario even more, and I also like Dark Pit quite a bit unfortunately. I’ll check up on it again next week, but there’s another thing coming out that will share my time with it.

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